If I could find a souvenir

Another year, done and dusted. But unlike last time, I remember this year starkly. Because, unlike last time, I want to remember this year.

This was the year when I felt like I was at the end of my rope, when I had almost given up. This was the year when I was scared shitless. When the number of exams I gave exceeded my toes and fingers put together by quite a margin. When I lost a friend and realised how insignificant everything else seemed. I let go of so many things because I just couldn’t goddamn take it anymore. And then I also realised that there are so many things I cannot let go…

This was the year when I promised myself I would make my new beginning worthwhile. And you know what? I did.

Because this was also the year I learnt that adapting is good. It is hard, but it can also make you fall in love with new places. I made new friends, to whom I owe my joyous self, because without them I could never love this new place as much.

This was the year I lost focus. This was the year I got it back (albeit at the very end of the year).

I willed myself to get back on track, to go for what I have been dreaming. Even though it’s difficult, even though the road may get long and winding.

I met a friend who is on the exact same road as I am; the year when, for the first time, I got company in this particular piece of mess.

This was also the year I met my Aunt (yes the lady8home is my aunt…talk about all kinds of amazing) and had crazy amounts of fun. And I met Rahul again (and had crazy amounts of fun, oh yes).

This was the year my country disappointed me. This was also the year when some people’s kick-ass-edness made me proud (because boy, can we protest).

So yes. 2012 was a mix of everything. It was my new beginning, one I was begging for. So if I could find a souvenir for it, I would hang it around my soul as a talisman.

Because this was the year I found myself back.


4 thoughts on “If I could find a souvenir

  1. Absolutely amazing piece. You said it all, and more. I loved every line,and it’s so you Ria. I love you girl, truck loads. Wish you a bountiful New year, with all kinds of amazing, fun things happening to you. Give your Ma some more grief, but good kind of grief. The eating kind, having a blast kind, weaving rainbows kind. Muah!!!!

    • And I love YOU! So much! You’re the best aunt ever. I cannot wait to spend many more days with you and do crazy fun stuff.
      Oh that I will :P
      Happy New Year to you Mesho,Neil and Aryan. And Leo and Marina too ;)

  2. Firstly, why am I reading this SO DAMN LATE??? I thought I had only one post of yours to catch up with and I find so many unread ones!! *Imagine my horror*
    Truly, 2012 was one hell of a year. So many things, all jumbled up. I know you struggled, but it did end up well in the end isn’t it? :)
    All I can say for myself is, I am glad you were a part of this year of mine. And if I had to take a souvenir, I would take that hug of yours for it :)
    Love you Antara :)

    • I still have your last post to read too so no worries. But I seriously missed you here! :P

      I would hug you and crush you with my bhalobasha :)

      And I am so glad that you found your happy place too.

      I love you.

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